September 10, 2008. That’s the day I left the U. S. to live in China for what was supposed to be a year. Now five years has passed since that day. This photo, taken on the plane from Chicago to Korea, forever helps me remember the journey I took.
Three years in China and two in Thailand. Four of those years have included my husband’s presence overseas, too, making life easier and more enjoyable. The first year was fun but very challenging. Missing my husband, who was back in MN during that time, was one of the hardest trials I’ve endured.
I don’t write a lot here. In some ways that is sad to me. But I’m a wife and mother first. Then an educator and student. I’m juggling teaching for over ten colleges and universities, with a load of several hundred students at a given time. I’ve been learning Thai and taking graduate courses. Come spring, I will likely be enrolled in two master’s degrees at the same time. I’ve figured out that studying culture is where I want to be, hence my pursuit of degrees in Intercultural Studies and Sociology. My husband is also a graduate student. And my boy is growing, growing, growing, all of the time.
Reflecting upon my life overseas isn’t always easy, because there was a lot of issues with adjusting to life in China originally. I met some great people and had some wonderful adventures, even with the frustrations I faced. However, life in Thailand is much easier and more enjoyable. I don’t foresee leaving Thailand for years, if ever. I never felt that about China. I was always living with one foot outside of the culture, wondering exactly “why” I was there and wishing to be home. But here, in Thailand, I feel settled, at peace.
One of the main issues that I have been struggling with lately is wondering “where” my son is from. He was born in China. He is American but has been on U. S. soil for less than six full months of his life, just visiting. He’s being raised in Thailand. So what is his hometown? I don’t rightly know. But I know I’m from Lakeville, MN. It’s where my roots are.
Much has changed in five years. I left before I turned 30 and now I’ve only spent my 30s overseas. That’s a really strange phenomenon for me to grasp.
Next year in 2014, Phil and I will have reached the “halfway” point where we have spent half of our marriage in MN and half overseas. From April 20, 2014 onward, the tipping point will be that more of our marriage is overseas.
My friends have changed but are forever in my heart. Many of them have had a lot of life changes. Some have fallen in love, gotten engaged, or gotten married. Most of my friends were married when I left. So many babies, so very many babies, have been born since I left. It’s nice to see photos of those babies on Facebook, but I often long for more. I cannot wait until my next visit. Though it will be just that: a visit, not a final homecoming.
I do hope to post more here before another year passes, but, if not, I’m not too sad about my lack of writing. I know my priorities need to be spending time with my family and with balancing my work and studies.
I still cannot believe it’s already been five years.
Chicky Net – The social network for expat women living in Thailand